Many challenges these last few weeks

 Life’s challenges seemed to be on the increase these last few weeks. Normally I enjoy the late summer and autumn seasons, in part because September is my birthday month, the colors of the trees are changing and looking quite impressive, but much moreso due to the fact that Marie and I were married in mid-October. We both enjoyed traveling, and we did a lot of it in the early to mid-autumn.

Marie, Kristin, exploring the North Bay area

At Redwoods National Park, CA

Things have been quite a bit different beginning in early September of this year. Of course there is the ongoing grieving process which adds ongoing challenges. But it was in early September when I answered a phone call, which in hindsight, was probably not a good thing to do. The caller identified himself as Sam, an anti-fraud staff person with the bank I have been with for decades. Having been a victim of a credit card problem in the spring, I hesitantly answered the person’s questions, but he came across quite legitimate, and knew a lot about me and my bank. Without going into detail, I was led down a rabbit-hole. In just a few days, and several phone calls later, I discovered that both my credit and debit cards had been corrupted. I could use the one to determine what the bank account held, but could not withdraw any funds. In that short period of time while his investigation was going on, I came to discover that almost fifty thousand dollars had been removed. Of course that was a significant concern! The bank account had been growing nicely and I had fully intended to use much of it to support various Godly charitable organizations that we had supported over the years. So with this apparent loss, I immediately began praying, asking for God’s intervention, since everything we had ever owned, including our finances, were all due to His many blessings. We had always tried to be frugal and practical in overall spending habits, and God-honouring with our tithes. I figured if He wanted me to continue to support the various organizations that honored Him, He would intervene, and gave the situation to Him. Perhaps this was a test. At any rate, several days later, in checking the account, the exact amount had been returned! I still had to replace both cards, and visit several places which I have regular payments, but that was a relatively small inconvenience compared to the loss of so much money, and who know what would happen next! By the end of the month, things seemed to be back to normal and so far has continued that way. PTL!! I pray for Sam every day, that God's Holy Spirit would reach him and help him realize that God wants an eternal relationship with Him!

Another unfortunate event occurred during this time. A former Visitor Services employee in the Ontario Provincial Parks system, whom I knew from Pinery, not Rondeau, passed away. I hadn’t known her well, but our paths continued to cross over the years even up until recently. She married a fellow who was on the faculty of an Ontario community college, who periodically brought some of his class to Rondeau for outdoor education when I was there. Then they were both involved with Quest Nature Tours, a company that I led or co-led nature tours with to Costa Rica in the late 80s and early 90s, and even met them for dinner on one occasion in Costa Rica. In the last few years, they would come to Rondeau for some spring birding and we would catch up a bit.

More recently and in a completely different situation, I was subpoenaed to be a witness in a murder trial. Not exactly something anyone would look forward to, I’m sure. The actual murder occurred in January of 2024. That was the beginning of a very challenging year for me, as Marie’s health was on a more serious decline at that time, resulting in her passing away in late May of that year. But regarding the murder, I had been out roaming around the back roads of a part of Chatham-Kent that I often traveled, and discovered the body of an adult male which had been dumped along the side of a road/canal, belly up, partially submerged and only partially clothed. It was the first dead body I had ever encountered in the many places I roamed, and it was definitely a shock. I immediately phoned 911 and talked with the operator for 20 minutes or so, until a couple of investigating officers arrived, asking all sorts of questions before allowing me to leave.

Although the murder took place almost 3 years ago, the trial is currently underway. I had to meet with the crown attorney and an investigating officer a couple of weeks ago, to discuss a lot of details regarding my involvement, and prepare to be a witness in the early part of the trial. Fortunately my direct involvement during the trial was relatively short compared to what it could have been, and as far as I know, I am finished with it even though the actual trial may continue for another 10 days or so. However it brought back so many unfortunate memories about the situation. Even though it was a trial by judge, not jury, there were about 30 family members or friends of the deceased in the courtroom. As I left, I noted several of them looking at me and giving me a sort of thumbs up, thanking me for what I had to contribute. I talked briefly with a couple of them as I was leaving the courtroom. I drive by the spot where I found the body on a regular basis, every time I go to St. Clair NWA, and relive some of the memories each time. They just never go away.

Since the early part of September, I have been involved with the weekly sessions of a Grief Share group. It has been okay, but so far not terribly helpful. Almost everyone else has lost parents, a sibling or a child, so while the grief they experience is legitimate, it is nothing like losing a spouse who you became one with in marriage and who had experienced significant abuse in her early years. Many of the topics discussed at Grief Share relate to things that I don’t and haven’t had to deal with, such as anger, regret, and other things. I consider my situation vastly different from the others. I have to be careful what I share at these meetings, as what comes to mind in response to the questions and comments, of the gathering is so much different than the others. I think my primary purpose to be at these meetings, is to share the good things that have come out of my grief rather than what I might learn from the other’s difficulties and challenges, but be careful and sensitive as to how I share it.

Of course I miss Marie a lot! But as I have learned so much about what she was dealing with, especially internally as I have read her journals, I am even more impressed by who she was while we were married, and certainly very thankful that God rescued her from the path that the devil was leading her along. I have been incredibly blessed to have her as my wife and best friend for so many years!!

Marie, 2004

There are days, or at least parts of a day, that seem more challenging than others in dealing with my grief. In spite of dealing with the challenging events described above, I have benefited from the pleasant weather to be out roaming around God’s creation, rejoicing and praising Him almost continually. And that is immensely more enjoyable than dealing with these other things. One of my favourite songs is How Great Thou Art, and no question one of my favourite singers who does an amazing job with it is Sandy Patty. This is an earlier version of her singing, when her voice was in its prime, and here is the link. At any rate, I spend a lot of time exploring and rejoicing in God’s creation and worshiping Him, even singing parts of this song. I am so thankful that He gave me a wonderful passion for exploring His creation, and growing in Him all the more as a result, and able to capture tidbits of it via the photography gift he has given me.

These next two photos were taken on my phone, just yesterday, at Rondeau while out on an 8 km walk. Cloudy, cool and breezy but a joyful time with God, my Creator who loves me more than I know!! 

South Beach waves

West South Point Trail

 

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